mmmbliss :)

Jessica Annabelle — Sat, 17 Dec 2011 08:05:50 +0000

they boy and i had two dates. it was delightful made him food, made out, made our way to chatterbox, made for such a lovely early wake up. and then i had a great time at the cece fundraiser (you should be following: supportcece.wordpress.com) and we went to chatterbox again.

pretty crushed out. it’s pretty great.

tonight sarah made me shabbat dinner, we watched the 1941′s occupy wall street video on youtube and then some 90s documentary about born agains and televangelists. made christmas plans to (1) get chinese food (2) get smashed and watch the passion of the christ and (3) spend the whole day together!

hh took me dancing

tomorrow’s a ball

and just a few days from now probly madison.

fuckyeah life lately. xo goodnight

TYSN holiday ask

Jessica Annabelle — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 05:05:16 +0000

drafted! bam!

do i still have a million things to do?
yes!
even though i ran three errands after work too?
yes!
wtf is with this busy week man?
dude, i dunno. but i have a headache and am tired and like i said, a million things to do before my epic holiday card making while vegan hot chocolate drinking date tomorrow
well at least there’s that.

best birthday present i have ever made

Jessica Annabelle — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 17:02:22 +0000

beaded earrings (complementary, but never matching, duh)
in a little vegan chocolate box with a fabric scrap folded inside so they look the prettiest
wrapped in pink newsprint, with photos of buildings
with a homemade tracing paper book card affixed to the top
by a pretty gold glittered red ribbon.

now can it be eleven so i can give it?

not my week, whoa

Jessica Annabelle — Tue, 22 Nov 2011 07:21:22 +0000

friday i was really, unbelievably, superbly terrible to someone i care about kindof a shit ton.
saturday i apologized, and spent the whole day furious at myself
sunday i spent the whole day furious at myself, and decided to cut that out in the evening. cried on the new roommates shoulder. switched moods to “terrified he’s going to break up with me”. had a date. felt good to let myself be happy for some hours.
today i spent much of the day terrified he was going to break up with me, but he isn’t. we’re making dinner tomorrow. it’s not a break up date. it’s a real one. i have never felt so relieved. i really can’t wait to hug him.

#weird inbetween place of not being in love with someone *yet*. my heart felt all shit-shit-shit-i’m-gonna-break. i’m really, really glad my heart isn’t getting broken this week.

and, i’m gonna not be an asshole to this really great person again. and maybe extrapolate that to not being a asshole to people i’m scared are too good for me generally. because actually i am (at least) better than this. and what a nightmare. and now its bedtime.

thank god i’m going home.

oh so good

Jessica Annabelle — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 17:49:11 +0000

thought my haircut was gonna not happen, but then it did! i am so short on the sides. it feels the loveliest. and i got checked out!

had some day drinks, plus dessert

shooting was pretty awesome, also pretty exhausting. hard to hold your body really tightly and focus super hard for a long time in a bangy hot unpleasant room. and the glock i shot was pretty big for me.

other things my date did: tear off my shirt. without any trouble. straight down the front, then both the sleeves. melt. annnd sleep tied to my bed, double melt.

also i got invited to come to a train the trainers meeting for know your rights trainings. really stoked about that

gotta go put on a cute outfit and start my day now- lunch at the u, stopping by afro, picking the cutest femme up from class and having coffee, attending a know your rights training, going dick shopping, and then (like all good nights) dancing. duh.

ps- i emailed because i didn’t want to call. but i think it went well. i was satisfied with the email, in any case. we’ll see how it pans out

ok time to go

i

Jessica Annabelle — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 05:27:48 +0000

wish i had energy to watch gossip girl before bed but
i have to wake up early for a haircut which should be great
and then send some fundraising emails
and a break up email which i am really pretty completely unsure of how to do. eff.
but then i’m going shooting. like with a gun. which is, won’t lie, not something i ever expected to do on a date. but i’m pretty excited. cuz i liked taking the .22 rifle class at camp a lot when i was twelve and i imagine i’ll still have fun shooting stuff now. also was a big archery fan in gym.

the end.

jess a.

Jessica Annabelle — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 16:15:11 +0000

community member
perpetrator support
survivor
recent avenger
femme

relevant identities of the day. who are you <3

know what’s tired?

Jessica Annabelle — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 16:13:41 +0000

femmes driving butches to state mandated service.

know what else is tired?

state oppression and exploitation.

know what we should spend the day doing?

smash smash smash

people

Jessica Annabelle — Mon, 07 Nov 2011 16:08:36 +0000

1. assigned male person buys some big gold hoop earring from me at work, says, “i’m into gender bending you know? do like these? do you think they’re good? cuz i want to gender bend. i’m british. i don’t care what these fucking americans think about me- i want to gender bend.” and i’m like, yeah they’re awesome earrings, go for it. and person pays, tries to put the earrings on, can’t, so i offered to help. and person’s like “thanks, thanks. i’m a hetero, but like i said, i’m into gender bending” and i say ha, for sure, i’m gay mostly, i’m into gender bending too. and person says “well, thanks man! ma’am! man! awesome!”

i love my life

2. straight boy hit on me at work some weeks ago, and i’d been trying to decide if having straight [piv] sex would totally trip me out or not, so i called him. went over to his house. spent a pleasant (in the unimpressive sense of the word) evening talking about his bookshelf, which featured exceptional white male authors. asked if he knew, among all the great classics, what was missing. he thought about it, took some guesses. and i said no, none of those. women.

he admitted that i was correct.

i said, after he played me chopin (the highlight of the evening) i’m usually gay, but i’d have sex if you want. he was somewhat taken aback. and i learned that i don’t in fact trip out having penetrative sex with flesh dicks. kinda awesome.

3. one of the people i’m dating washed dishes the whole entire time that i was washing dishes at a free dinner we were at. he’s pretty crush worthy. kind of a big fan.

4. have drink plans with someone in a moment. someone said i should pick where ever i wanted to go. so i picked. and someone didn’t want to go there because he didn’t want to run into any one he knew. so i suggested that when one is pickier than one’s company, one might do chivalrous thing number one-make an awesome plan as opposed to chivalrous thing number two-let company decide where to go. someone said place i picked was fine after all.

what i should have done is asked why. i asked later. his reason was ok. i’m just used to that sentence being less than ok. he said he figured as much, right after he’d sent it. good friend. excited to start hanging out more.

5. L thinks i deserve to be treated really, really, really well and gets fussy at me if i think about hanging out with people who treat me pretty well or good most of the time or good sometimes or things like that. i don’t totally agree, because i’m not *that* special, but i totally love that she thinks it.

things i have need of:

Jessica Annabelle — Fri, 08 Jul 2011 06:29:51 +0000

shelves, for my history books! ha! i am going to put them in chronological order by the earliest events in each book

~~jewelry~~ someone to sit near me while i go through all my jewelry and stuff and slim it down. too much stuff. too few cute, proportionally.

money for books/books. i want two by waziyatawin, hook’s teaching to transgress, maybe a boondocks comic anthology, more butler (octavia), and sapphire’s new one

time

better focus whilst packing. like now.

enough sleep to wake up when my alarm goes off tomoro